Fatwa: # 45387
Category: Psychological and Social
Country:
Date: 1st September 2020

Title

Marital query - Should i seek a divorce?

Question

Asalamualaikum wr wb Im a married sister with 2 children Alhamdulillah. I live with my mother with my children for the past 2 and half years. My husband lives with his mother. We have a house but he does not want to live with me until I have treatment regarding my mental health which is on hold due to COVID 19. However he has found another sister religious from a conservative family in Morocco. He was chatting to her behind my back. It made soo upset and it hurts so bad and I would like to seek divorce. He wants to keep us both but I cannot accept this situation. He does not support us financially or plays role in our lives what can I do?

Answer

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

Sister in Islam,

You mention that you and your husband are separated for two and a half years. You also mention that your husband has found another sister. You would like to seek a divorce.

Sister, the fact that you and your husband have been separated for such a long time shows that there is an issue in the marriage. There should be a way where both of you can come together and discuss the reasoning behind such a long separation. It is understandable that due to COVID 19, there was a delay in the mental health treatment. However, prior to the emergence of the disease, was there any treatment done? If so, why is there still a separation?

If there is an underlying reason behind the separation, it should be known. Your husband seeking another sister for marriage is indeed heart-breaking for you. However, seeking a divorce will not change your emotions and feelings. It is an instant decision made without foresight and thinking. A decision based on emotions have negative consequences. Think of the consequences of the divorce upon yourself and children. It will negatively impact your life as well. Divorce is difficult. Its repercussions are long lasting.  If there is any chemistry and happiness in staying with your husband, it should be made known to him. He needs to realize that you are willing to be with him.

We advise you seeking counsel with senior family members. Explain to them your situation. Seek medical help immediately regarding your condition. Be proactive. Be optimistic. Turn to Allah Ta’ala and ask Allah Ta’ala to guide you to that which is the best for you.

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

Mahmood Suliman

Student Darul Iftaa
Gaborone, Botswana

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.

 

 

 

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